Kicking 2018 Square in the Ass

And Choctaw Electric Co-Op said "Let there be light" and there was light - and lights. And a sweet new TV picking up the local digital channels. And a DVD player for watching movies after a long day of cutting trees. And a slick clock radio just because. And a microwave since cooking everything over a fire is stupid. And...

You may have already figured out that WE FINALLY GOT ELECTRICITY!

Ralph Waldo Emerson said that "Without electricity, the air would rot". And while he may have made the worst kind of cheap-o TVs sold at Walmart in the 80's, I kind of think he's right on with that quote.

We've been roughing it by lantern and campfire out at our property since March and last night marked the first day we were able to turn the light on to use the bathroom, flush the toilet and take a warm shower. Then we were able to lay in bed and watch the local weather and then a movie in a comfy heated camper under the warmth of an electric blanket. The leap made from spending sultry summer nights on a cot in a tent to last night's luxurious sleep on a heated memory foam bed was so giant I pulled a groin muscle that wasn't even mine.

I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE WHAT IT WILL BE LIKE WHEN THE CABIN IS COMPLETE.

Every single thing we do to improve the property makes us fall deeper in love with it and it becomes harder and harder to leave to come back to reality.

We went up to the property Friday afternoon. Our friends Tommy and Marsha, who you may remember purchased the land across the road from us in September and we recently met, were going to be there Thursday through Sunday. It has still rained there at least an inch a week for as long as I can remember and this week was no exception. So it was still as flooded and muddy as ever, but we're learning to work with it. For Christmas gifts to each other this year, Michelle and I decided to give the gift of finally purchasing the power pole. Generally speaking, I usually save the giant pole gift for Valentine's Day. Never the less, we called up the Friday before Christmas and paid for the pole to be installed. We weren't expecting it to be installed for a few weeks, but on our way up last Friday Tommy called and told me the electric company was at my place putting it up.

Note the County Road behind the pole here. Yep, it's still flooded.

It was about 3:30 when we arrived so there was no time to gather the parts I'd need to install a service panel and outlet below the meter that day. We just roughed it that night, spending most of the evening around the campfire with our friends.

So great sharing the campfire with good people.

The next morning we went into town and I bought everything to get the camper trailer on the grid. We spent most of the day working on the power and burning brush piles.

And that's all there is to it. A long extension cord to the camper trailer and we're in temporary business.

We have three piles this big to burn.

Tommy and Marsha left early Sunday morning. Michelle and I had to decide if we were to stay or leave and the new power was so awesome we decided to stay. First we checked all of our cameras and found some more great shots of wildlife.

Note the times of day here. A good reason we wear our pistols when we're messing around in the woods.

Mutant raccoons.

Deer and raccoons living in harmony. It's anarchy!

One mean pussycat.

Nice little doe.

A nice spike.

Now we're talking!

"Is that a camera? Better inspect closer..."

Deer selfie.

Next we went in to town again. This time we brought back some amenities to help pass the time during the long dark nights.

Our new antenna.

Who knew Domino's delivered way out there?

Electricity rules! We spent the final weekend of 2018 at our property in style. One year from now we hope you'll be reading the last chapter and seeing the final pics of our beautiful finished cabin, where we plan to ring in 2020 like it's 1999.

Soggy Bottoms

It's been a really wet year. Our property has had 47 inches of rain so far in 2017 with 11 inches falling since my last blog post 30 days ago and 17 inches total in the last 90 days.

The road from our cabin site leading back into our property.

We've been up a few times lately, but it's so wet and there's so much standing water it's nearly impossible to do anything productive. Our two ponds up front have completely flooded the surrounding low areas and the pond at the back of the property has swollen to overtake my feeder.

The ponds have flooded the road leading back into the property.

The legs of my main feeder, where I saw the 12 point buck are now under water.

With two of our three feeders spreading corn into standing water we haven't attracted much more than varmints.

This feeder, standing in water seems to mostly attract adorable yet non edible Disney characters.

A nice size Wiley Coyote came through one afternoon in between rains.

Luckily, one of our feeders is on dry ground and the deer are loving it. In the last few days we've seen two spikes, a six point and eight point along with a few doe on that feeder alone. Including the twelve point I saw last time, I'd say we've got a pretty nice deer population.

6 Point Buck

Small Spike Buck

Large Spike Buck

Two Doe

8 Point Buck

We're waiting for the water under and the corn inside two of the feeders to go down before we can move them to higher ground in hopes of continuing to attract deer. We haven't done any serious hunting yet, but I feel like we will soon.

The best news from our trip up yesterday is that the pig situation is completely under control at the moment. The last pig was on the property November 7 and he fittingly posed for a picture on his way out.

I tried to break my foot off in many of these asses.

We met new neighbors a few visits back named Tommy and Marsha. They recently purchased the property across the road from us and are doing the same thing we are. They actually live in Richardson, just south of us in McKinney and are our age. They have moved a fifth wheel on their property while they plan and build their cabin. They're great folks with whom we are becoming good friends. We keep each other informed on the goings on around our two places when we're not there at the same time. Tommy told me he spoke to the pig man down the road recently about the situation, wondering if he'd sold any. Pig man told him he wasn't able to sell because every since "those people" started causing trouble (that'd be me and Michelle) causing him to have to keep them penned up the pigs aren't getting enough water and it's making them sick. Incidentally I'm not sure he has running water at all. So the truth finally came out about why the pigs were out in the first place, although we already suspected it was so he wouldn't have to feed them. He said his largest pig died while birthing a litter of 22. So, add 21 to the total. He also told Tommy he was missing several pigs and assumed I killed them. I didn't kill any, but I'm glad to know he assumes I did so that he will keep them penned in fear of his crazy trouble making neighbor blastin' and stackin' 'em high. He also said he didn't want to cause any trouble but also didn't like being told what to do; another good thing to hear because while he may not like me telling him what to do, he damn sure did what I told him to. We'll see what happens from here but all has been quiet for the last three weeks.

We have not set our electric meter or dug our ditches to bring the line to the cabin as it is still all under water as you can see in the pic below. This is the main county road half covered in water. I'm standing in the driveway taking this picture. The pole on the left is directly across the road from where my pole will sit, which is currently under water.

We're learning that as much as we want to keep going full steam ahead, we really just have to have patience and wait on the weather. Even though progress has come to a near stop, we still plan to have the cabin complete by next fall or sooner. We're hoping to have the pole installed by Xmas, but that depends on the receding water.

All in all, we're still in love with our property and its potential. We're now planning our new ponds and dirt work as it's obvious we're going to have to get this water under control. There's so much to do and we're excited for all of it!

Day of the Pigs Invasion

Before I begin you must know that I'm not exactly proud of how I first handled this weekend's situation. And remember, all's well that ends well, right?

This weekend Michelle and I were excited to dig our first hole and pour our first pier at our home in the woods. We did all the math and gathered all the materials; 1200 pounds of concrete, 55 gallons of water, tools, etc. We had decided to scrap the metal shipping container as a storage building all together and instead decided to build the storage building ourselves. After all, it'd be half the price, it'd be square rather than rectangle and it would match our cabin. Why we hadn't thought of this before I don't know. Plus, building it before the cabin will give us a little practice and we'll be able to work out some of the inevitable unforeseen kinks since the storage shed will be built in the exact same manner as the cabin.

Before I go further we have to rewind to about 4 weeks ago, back to when John and I went hunting at the opening of bow season, back to the previous blog post. Remember the picture I posted of those domestic pigs? Those that I said "I'm not sure where they came from"? What I didn't say was how much damage they'd caused. The ground was completely torn upside down in many places, like a tractor came through and randomly tilled the soil all over. At that point I assumed it was a one time thing and gave it little thought.

Fast forward a couple of weeks. My friend John lost his deer lease down south and needed a place to locate his hunting trailer. What better place than ours to bring it!? It's there for when he'd like to hunt and also for us while we build. Perfect! So, I help him bring it up. When we arrived with the trailer in tow I was devastated to see even more pig damage. So much damage, all over the place that it was obvious the same large group of domestic pigs were still on the loose. But we were only there long enough to unhook the trailer and with all of the recent heavy rains it was too muddy to go on back and survey the rest of the property. So at that time there wasn't much that could be done other than be concerned if the pigs would continue their destruction.

Our new digs while we build. Way better than a tent!

And that brings us up to date to this weekend when once again, upon arrival, I notice more damage. This is the first time Michelle had seen it. She was blown away by the sheer devastation of the soil. All over, even where we had previously laid out our cabin grid - over the newly leveled ground - all torn upside down into shitty, muddy uneven ground. As we drove the road in to our place we took notice of our neighbors' (about .25 mile up the road) manicured green lawn that had been torn up. So we immediately unloaded the four wheeler and road up to introduce ourselves for the first time and inquire about their yard. Pigs. And they said they belong to our other neighbor, crazy junk man. You see, I've also never mentioned we have a fellow who lives about 100 yards down the road from us. You'd have to pass our driveway to see his place so we rarely go that far. It's on the opposite side of the road. It looks like a dump that farm animals have taken over. All of his animals are penned up in makeshift pens made from pallets, wire, fence panels and old cars. Goats, pigs, chickens, peacocks, dogs, cats, ducks and geese - and trash. Lot's of trash. All built right on the road. We've only heard stories of him and assumed he was a crazy old man. It was time to find out.

When we left the first neighbors house we rode straight down to his crazy property but we didn't see him. He doesn't have a door to knock on. We would later find out he lives in one of his barns. Since he wasn't around at the time, we headed back to our property and rode back to check our cameras.

We were shocked to find John's deer stand dangling from a tree, with the ladder and support completely twisted and broken. A quick look at his camera film showed us what happened.

This heavy stand overlooks John's feeder pictured below.

Many massive pigs. 400+ pounders.

3 days in a row, pigs everywhere.

Completely outraged, I rode back to the old man's place and he happened to be walking across the road to his mailbox. I introduced myself and asked him about his pigs being out. He began the rantings and ramblings of a crazy old man, even though I believe him to be in his 50's. He had many excuses, most of which involved his health and his helpers he had to fire. Supposedly one of his disgruntled helpers sabotaged his electric fence that held his pigs and he can't get it repaired because he can't get around too good and doesn't know how to. This happened over a month ago. His pigs have been free range over 4 weeks. Now, before you assume this isn't that big of deal let me tell you the number we're talking about.... FIFTY SEVEN. FIFTY SEVEN pigs are roaming free, and they have now decided to make my property their home. I told him of the estimated $500 in damage and he told me he understood he was responsible and would pay me for it. First of all, this guy maybe makes $500 a year and second of all I told him I wasn't interested in his money, only in him penning up his pigs. He offered no solution, only excuses so I offered to help him fix his electric fence. The problem is it's torn up and partially laying underwater right now from the recent flooding rains. A disheartening solution that requires a long wait, but what else could I do?

At a loss, I went back to the property and I called the sheriff's department for advice. Obviously, they can't do anything. They did however recommended three solutions. 1) I can legally pen them up on my property and the sheriff will give me a written order to sell them. "I have to build a pig pen now and go into the pig business?" I said. 2) I can legally kill them to protect my property. "I don't want the job of cleaning up 60 bloated pig carcasses" I calmly and rationally explain. 3) I can call the agriculture and wildlife department, as letting pigs run loose is against their rules, and they would talk to him. That sounded most reasonable to me, so Michelle made the call. She finds out that of course, they're too busy to come out on the weekend and basically gave us the same number 1 and number 2 solution as the sheriff. I get it. Nobody wants to deal with this shit. Shoot the bastards and be done with it. At this point I'm still not sure what to do, but it's still early in the day and we have lot's of work to do.

We unload our tools and materials and begin to layout the grid for our storage shed. That's when all hell broke loose. While trying to dig our first holes, the pigs began to arrive. One after another. 5, 6, 10, 20! From all directions and walking right through our work site. We'd run off what we could in one direction, turn around and a herd from another direction was coming through the woods. It was like nothing we'd ever saw short of a zombie movie. We yelled and ran at them and they wouldn't move. I hit some with a board and they'd scatter out but stick around. Finally, we got them ran back to the road and got back to work. Then it happened again. Then again. Then again. We couldn't stop them. So I started shooting at the ground around them. They didn't care. We'd been there for hours, interrupted every 15 minutes by having to run off hoards of pigs. Chasing them through the mud and woods and the briers. Yelling and throwing things. They were mounting each other and you could kick them in the face and they wouldn't stop fucking. Finally I lost it. I shot one square in the ham. He shook his leg and kept fucking his whore pig wife. I shot another in the ass. He ran away into the woods. I was using my .22 revolver. I didn't want to shoot them dead. I wanted them gone. I know it's somewhat cruel, but by their reaction, they didn't seem to mind too much, the fat bastards. I shot 6 pigs out of at least 40 or 50 invading our build site and eventually, by near dark we got them all to move on. All day long, we were only able to dig 9 holes because of this shit.

What should've been a couple of hours took all day. Imagine pigs trampling through the level lines, defiantly fucking each other right in your face while you try to map out a square and level grid. No, not frustrating at all.

The next morning I felt bad, sure that some of those pigs I shot would run off and die. It wasn't right. I needed to kill them if I was to shoot them at all. But I didn't want that either. I didn't bring a second ice chest to hold a butchered pig and I didn't want to have to deal with dead ones laying around. And frankly, I don't want to live next to a crazy old man who, even though entirely legal, slaughtering all of his pigs would likely not make him a friendly neighbor. I figured I'd take it one step at a time and go see our neighbor again this morning and try to find a solution. We started early, ready to mix and pour concrete, figuring I'd go see the neighbor after. Then it started. Again, pig after pig after pig. Over and over and over. Rooting, digging, pissing and fucking all over and around our build site, camp site and everywhere in between. I started screaming and running them like crazy. I got my 12 gauge, loaded with slugs and blasted it at their feet as fast as I could rack the pump. They wouldn't move. I was so enraged I ran to the neighbors house, stood out front and yelled. He came out and I screamed at him for 5 minutes. It turns out this is what he needed. I just had to out crazy that son of a bitch. Apparently he wasn't aware until that point that he lost his title of craziest asshole in the county to me. He dropped everything he was doing (nothing) and began his journey to gets these things under control. Like it or not, I told him, I will be all over your property today. I will build a pen myself and round these pigs up. I explained I had water, sewer and gas lines under my camper and if the pigs destroy them or anything else things would be very bad for him. He was very appreciative of the advice and help I was offering. Also, in all fairness, he is disabled.  His knees are terrible and he can barely walk. Still, I find no excuse in the condition he has allowed his homestead and livestock to take and how the hell is any of that my problem? At any rate, a new beginning now emerged. I felt better. I had shouted it out and had concluded I had no choice but to put my build and my own property on hold until I handled the pig problem. After all, they would destroy anything I did regardless if I left it up to this guy alone. So I walked back to my place. We buried a dead pig we found across the road. It had a bullet wound in it's side. I have no idea how it happened and I never told the neighbor. I'm sure we'll find a few more bodies eventually but that's all for another day and is neither here nor there. At this point I see it as probably 6 less filthy animals destroying what I worked so hard for.  Feeling content and now resolved to do both, we began mixing concrete and rounding up pigs simultaneously. It was physically demanding, but it wasn't that challenging. Pigs are stupid as shit. The neighbor went to town and brought back corn for me to use to get the pigs to follow me to the small pen I repaired on his property. Michelle manned the gate and I'd get them in. Over the course of the day we got about half of them crammed in. The neighbor was very appreciative. That evening he came in with more fence panels, promising to stay up late and lock them up as they came back from wondering the whole goddamn county. We finished our concrete and even repaired damages to our fence caused by, you guessed it, pigs and decided to stay an extra night to make sure all the pigs were in fact put up by morning.

Monday morning we woke up to see more pigs on the road. Not surprised, we quickly began to round them up and within an hour we had about 40 penned up. Our neighbor was headed into town to get some helpers to fashion a loading shoot to load some pigs up for the sale. We'd done it. There was a real learning curve, but in the end it worked out. Now, do I believe this is the last of the pig invasion? Not for one dirty second. If Michelle and I hadn't done everything we did, the pigs would still be loose for god knows how long. I motivated and earned the respect of this guy with my craziness and our eventual goodwill solved the issue... for now. It's up to him and his helpers to gather the last handful and keep them penned up or sold. I'm not confident they will and I'm afraid my next recourse will have to be sudden and instant death to all pigs that walk through my fence. Either way once it's dried out I do plan to keep my word and help him with his electric fence as well, being the awesome person I am. Even if by then he only has 3 pigs still living.

Now that you know the whole story, here's our progress!

Our storage shed will be 12' x 12'. We dug 9 holes 2 feet deep, 6' apart. We tamped a few inches of gravel in each one then filled the tubes with concrete and inserted our 4" x 4" brackets. On these will rest the 2" x 6" floor joists, tied to the top center of the 4" x 4"s via a metal tie. We have not decided what the facade of the shed or cabin will look like. Possibly a stone skirt with corrugated tin siding. Possibly all wood with horizontal siding on the walls and wood shingle siding on the gables. Maybe a metal roof, maybe composite shingles. Either way, we need to decide quickly as we are really moving now, so long as the pigs are out of the way.

We're going back up this weekend, mainly to check the pig situation and repair John's deer stand but will probably either begin the footings for the cabin or begin the floor joists for the shed.

And now the best news of all. I have beautiful buck deer! Yes! I knew it. 3 bucks were caught on one of my feeder cameras. A spike, a 6 point and a BEAUTIFUL 12 point! We were blown away.

This guys eyes are bigger than his spikes.

A sweet 6 point buck at 9:22 in the morning!

WOAH! 12 point buck in the full hunter's moon just before light!!

And so concludes this weeks episode. Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as we enjoyed living it!

Quick Update

Bow season opened in Oklahoma in October. Last week John and I went up to hunt. He with his crossbow and I with my shotgun bow. John was really just checking things out, hunting antlers this year since his freezer is still full from last year. 

John sighting in his crossbow.

 I'm still hunting that stupid pig, who apparently is smarter than me. He's around and still showing up at random times, a day or two a week.

Still greasy.

I hunted one morning and one evening, waiting 'till dark in my stand, watching over my feeder and the pond. I ended up spotting only a nice sunset.

That pig will die from lead poisoning.

Even though it's really early in the season and was still hot and humid, deer are showing up. We've got pics of them now on all cameras, all times of day.

Looking at some little nubs on this guy. Future trophy?

We also found some new uninvited dinner guests had been there. Would've been nice to bring one of these guys home to the freezer too, but they were just passing through. A MASSIVE domestic sow and her idiot kids. Not sure where they came from or where they went.

Today Michelle and I were able to take off of work early and made our way up to Oklahoma. We stopped by the shipping/storage container place to buy our container and schedule it to be delivered but the owner, who we've been negotiating with was out of town and the person in charge just took our info and said they'd have him call us Monday. Hoping to get it delivered next week.

So we made our way further to the electric company and turned in our notarized paperwork. We meet the engineer again next week to stake the location the pole and meter is going and he will draw the plans for approval. Should be three weeks to power now!

We also stopped by the post office to see what we needed to do to get a mail box and address. We found out that we have to get with the county sheriff first who will give us our rural 911 address, which we then have to give to the post office. Then we just put up a box and begin sifting through the junk mail!